Report CITCO round 9 – Kikuoka – 9 August 2017

Oh no, surely not him again! Can’t we do something? Grumble, grumble. Surely we can. What do the bloody statutes say? Ho hum. So…ramble or results first? Results or ramble? Ok, you win let’s go ramble. Those of you looking exclusively for the results section are advised to fast forward about…Now! And before you go, a great big thank you to our sponsors, Citco! Now then, off you go…

To the results… Several traditionally friendly Frog faces were absent since they had been on a dedicated golf day trip to darkest Germany. The truly dedicated returned to follow up their 18 German holes with the extra 9 at Karaoke so a big well done mention must go out to Dennis, Craig and Jess for making the effort. That’s the spirit, chaps. Merve was down to start but suddenly became a Dan K lookalike on the first tee yet there they both were in the bar afterwards. It can be hard to keep up sometimes. In the end, 23 dedicated Froggy type people (which included two guests; the gloriously named Allard Fontein (could be a fine wine, no?) and Eric Masset) tip teed off having been wined and dined by the returning to the big time ever pheasant/effervescent Luc. Gone (for now) are the days of foie gras and Chateau Margaux, it seems. These things will almost certainly return. Small bags of very plain Jane Ready Salted crisps and cans of local beer offered a pragmatic current compromise and were thoroughly welcome. Some sort of odd tasting Dutch cough syrup that Luc was frantically talking up somewhat was also offered and generally gleefully accepted. Not exactly a class A product in my view but we’ll try anything at least once. Well done Luc!

Despite fine playing conditions throughout, there was a standard scratch score of just 14 [15, Ed.] points. Certainly not great. Maybe that English idiot friend was right? Oh rats. As James, suitably supported by Jess, eloquently intimated during the presentation over an efficiently served dinner of fish and chips or steak and chips, this can largely be explained by the significant battle that went on for last place. Although both John and Will recorded uncomfortable single points figures, Delboy elbowed his way in to the reckoning with a miserable but well deserved 8 points. Meanwhile, we all recognise that Colin has all the attributes to be an excellent golfer. Nice shoes, colour coordinated outfit, smooth swing, regular practising. Looks the part in fact. Keep it up, matey. His mammoth 6 points took the pink ball. Thanks for coming, Colin. Our two guests, Allard and Eric came home with 15 and 3 points respectively. Respect and another pink ball respectively!

The prize for Nearest the Pin went to Will, the Bijnens Leary prize to Daniel and the Longest Drive to Craig. Congratulations to all of you.

Dennis came in at 6th with 14 points. Ayzo and Mark both hit 14 but nudged ahead on countback for 5th and 4th places. Craig made 18 points in perfect fashion. Playing off scratch, he made 9 pars. Morally, Craig was easily the real winner of the day by far. Quality stuff. That fluffy ginger beard is starting to look slightly ridiculous and should be attended to urgently, however. Dan and myself both managed 19 points and when I left the club, poor Dan was still analysing the scorecards seemingly trying to work out just how he didn’t manage the overall victory. It’s tough when you care deeply about something, isn’t it? Oh well, I assume that he found the answer somewhere. On the plus side, coming second at this level leaves room for improvement, Dan. Stay focused and you’ll get there. Life can be so very tough and unfair at times, don’t you think?

My particular flight involved the two winners of pink balls and the winner. A rare combination. An opportunity? I think that the attached photo recorded this moment appropriately.

The next Frogs event will be critical to those looking for pomp and ceremony and honour. It will be the decider. I have no idea when it is but I know it’s at Grand Ducal. Hopefully, someone will tell you all about it when they’re ready [24 August, Ed.].

Enough is enough.


Report from MixVOip Pairs competition – Junglinster – 2 August 2017

Before I update on what happened last night I think it is appropriate to remind ourselves as to whom last night’s trophy is dedicated, no other than two of the original founding frogs Dave Moody and Don McGregor who sadly passed away in recent years. For those of the younger frogs who perhaps did not have the pleasure to enjoy their company on many a froggie and non froggie occasion, they were two of the finest characters you could ever meet and it is fitting we should remember them on this occasion.

What they would have made of last nights competition format, god only knows but time has evolved and new formats are obviously interesting, as long as they are advised well in advance. Clearly the format was set up for the big hitting,talented frogs of which we have a few; otherwise why would a Frenchman play with a South African and a Scotsman with an Englishman; two clear favourites, with Botty and Stevie B, defending their crown won so convincingly last year.

As to the first tee, on a hot,sweaty evening, those not in shorts were to be uncomfortable, with Simon doing his best to explain Frank’s wishes as to competition format; by the time Maarten and I teed off the rules were more or less understood- a two team scramble with some complicated calculation of handicaps which not many understood and effectively took handicapping out of the equation. But there was an interesting twitch with each player having to contribute three tee offs- a feature carefully followed in our group certainly!

Anyhow all ten teams got safely off with Johnnie S as a last minute sub for the over worked Danny K (who does he work for now?)

With three birdies in their first five holes and three under par, the question on everyone’s lips was could the Dutchman of Precision and his Scottish partner with dicky knees,whom no one wished to play with, maintain their impressive start? You will have to wait and see!

MixVoip the competition sponsors had put up a number of lovely prizes and were profiling a charity: Catch a Smile a.s.b.l.
A worthy cause which we were able to contribute to and which Frank has separately reported on!

As to the novelty prizes, Nearest The Bottle on the 3rd was won by no other than Johnnie S, who we understand was trying to fade his ball round the corner to the green but instead drew it into the middle of the fairway and landed up close to the designated bottle In the middle of the fairway.

Nearest the water on the 5th was won by our South African b…., who hit an enormous drive over the water and landed in his own pitch mark just across the burn. Quite a shot by all accounts.

Nearest the pin on the 11th went to James where a spanking 8 iron went very close indeed.

Longest drive on the 6th went to Chris Juste who hit a stonker to within 35 yards of the green; where have you been Chris, we have missed you and where did that drive come from!

Back to the main event , the favourites were doing well but perhaps not as well as their pre-tournament status had foreseen.

Another pairing keeping the De Grote/Robertson team in their sight and playing together was the James King/ Martin Shapiro partnership, quite a pairing this one, the highly experienced King with his happy go lucky novice Shapiro.

Not to be outdone, one unlikely pairing of Richard Neale and Will Heath (welcome back Will, you have been missed) were also going along nicely.

Back to the Leaders’ progress their early birdie blitz could not be continued, and after missing a makeable birdie on 6,it was hands to the pumps with the short games of both players being tested before pars were saved on the final holes. So signing off three under par, with 23 points we knew we were likely to be in the frame somewhere.

As to final placings,

5th, Craig and Arnaud, 19 points- (two under par plus handicap of 1)
4th. Botty and Stevie B, 20 points- (two under par with no handicap adjustment)
3rd. Will and Richard, 20 points winning on countback- ( 1 over par with handicap of 3)
2nd James and Martin, 21 points- ( 1 under par with handicap of 2)
1st. Maarten and Dennis, 23 points- ( 3 under par with handicap of 2)

There you go, quite quite a tight finish with some special liquor prizes being aptly presented by Frank Maitry on behalf of MixVOip.

There was some other action before close of play with Frank and Jess claiming a sponsor’s exemption to avoid receiving the cabbage which turned out to be a cauliflower (luxembourgers don’t know the difference), which was then passed to Tony and Colin.

Some remaining prizes were kindly donated by Frank under a quickly organised Tombola, to those frogs who had not yet won a prize must to the annoyance of Johnnie S!

A final thank you to Frank and here’s to next year with another competition format!

And final thoughts to Don and Dave who were overseeing last nights goings on with some amusement!


Dennis and Captain Maarten